Points to Ponder

These are a few things that I was told about myself, and a few things I just found out. Either way, I need to write them down and think about them, so you get to read them. Sorry! Well, not really, I mean, it is my journal :)
1. That I am very forceful in my convictions
2. That I am blunt and upfront
3. That I "worry" too much about unsaved friends
4. That since I am not in college, I must be afraid of it
5. That friends agreeing to disagree is great

I have realized that I have come to a crossroad in life. And it made me think of a verse I memorized a few years ago. Jeremiah 6:16 "Stand at the crossroads and look. Ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls." That just hits home for me. Especially the rest for your souls part... kidding. But really, the spiritual wilderness that has resided over me for much of the past few months is running my well dry. I get snatches of Him here and there, and I grab ahold of them so tightly, not wanting them to diminish in any way. But they do... eventually. They lose their luster, their shine. I can't live on what I got yesterday. And I don't think He wants me too either. I have realized that everyday I need more of Him. I am to the point where I refuse to be satisfied with words, visions, glimpses, touches, and feelings I had yesterday, or the day before, or last month. I am stating that I know there is more of God to be had, and I will not be satisfied with what I have found and felt and touched and known. I need more. I need more of Him. He has become the air I breathe. He is becoming my everything. And in a world where we are programmed to not be satisfied, and to always want more things, more stuff, more junk... I have found that none of it matters. Things don't matter. When I signed up to be a follower of Christ, I gave up my need for everything but Him. He supplies my needs. And I am learning more and more to understand what Paul said when he stated, "I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received." Do I live a life, worthy of my calling? Doubtful. And its almost painful that i am just now coming to this conclusion, but I have to beleive and trust that everything has a time and a season, and everything works for the good of those who love God. He never fails me. He makes all things new. He lifts me when I my strength is gone. He carries me when everything drags me down. He never leaves my side.
So much to say, so few words to describe what I feel. I'll just leave it at this. Last night I got a word at church, and I'm gonna post it. I normally don't ever do this, but today seems like an exception.

My Spirit is upon you.
Will you let the fire that is in My heart, burn in your heart?
My Word will consume you.
I am a consuming fire.