is it all the same

::

the trees sway listlessly
moved by this cold November breeze
and I don’t know where I’m going
but I wish I knew where I was

isn’t it the truth
that with so much deception
its hard not to wander away
to have your own reasons why

but buried out there
heard between the lines
sometimes found drifting away
is an unexpected song being sung

we may not know what love means
the words may still be getting written
the music being cautiously played
and we’re both too afraid to listen

between the moments that linger before us
you’re always wanting me to leave
telling me to go while I can
because love won’t find this sort of man

but can you let me be who I am
maybe then you’ll be able to see
looking into my eyes and my heart
there is not one thing that you lack

so after all of this around us falls
when I no longer have to watch you
as you let yourself shutdown slow
and you weep without a tear in your eye

I know every time you close your eyes
you want so much more than you’ve got
if only you’d let me show you
everything is right in front of you

it all begins right here
so let’s see if it’s true
as well known as the breath you take
the morning will bring you something new

I’ll kiss your eyes as you wake
a new memory
is it all the same
is it all the same

::

a collaboration of repostings :: snippets that are still so, so true ::

And on days like today, I don't know. I just don't know.
--
So rolls the changing year, and so we change. Motion so swift we know not that we move."
--
I don't love like most people love. I'm not afraid of dark cramped places of the past and reoccuring nightmares of your life. I'm not afraid of your deep waters and very real pain that is held inside. I'm not afraid to tell you I love you, and mean it wholeheartedly. I'm not afraid to stand before you and show you that I have nothing. Just know this. Being who you are is perfect, and I wouldn't want it any other way. You do make me happy. Whether you believe that is up to you. But it's the truth, and my heart. If it takes me the rest of my life to prove it to you, then I'll gladly give it. No time is wasted. I don't invest in worthless things. Life is the way it is and nothing can change it. I'm not trying to change you or judge you. Merely stating that I love you, and I always have hope. When I see you, I don't see bad, I see the good. The bad doesn't matter, because all in all, what matters is who I see. You think I only see what you put out there. I see more. I see you. let's see where this road leads... I'll be right behind you.
--
The clock ticks out its rhythm
I listen to time disappear
I sit still and wonder
How did I get to here

Your face I don’t always see
Your touch won’t seem to stay
But your voice still lingers clearly
Your words… they won’t go away

This house constantly shifts with age
The floorboards complain with misplaced weight
But it’s withstood life’s weather
It still stands strong, solid, and straight

The drawer still holds my list
It rests among letters I have written for years
Voicing what you have never heard
Words admitting my hopes, fears, dreams, and tears

Because your face I don’t always see
And your touch won’t seem to stay
But your voice still lingers so clearly
Your words… they just won’t go away

The clock still ticks its rhythm
Every stroke giving admission for time to appear
Standing and wanting to run
To find and know anywhere but here
--
I'm feeling stir crazy.

I've been chewing my nails all night. And now I sit here thinking, "I wish I could walk into my room, grab my passport, then my purse on the way out the door, and head off to somewhere...anywhere." I'm just completely unsatisified with life right now. Unhappy with circumstances, and hating the fact that I'm upset about any of it. I normally could care less, just go with the flow, lay back and not worry about a thing, enjoy life where I'm at. But I keep getting these random moments of inspiration and motivation to go... run. To change everything, and totally disrupt the life I know. Who knows what'll happen. Knowing my mind, tomorrow I'll wake up feeling back to my usual self. But if not.... if I wake up and lay in bed thinking the same thing I've been thinking for days, something's gonna have to change. Cause this is ridiculous. I can't consistently hear my heart day in and day out utter the same words.

"This is it?"
--
Hours continuing long, sore and heavy-hearted
Hours at dusk, when I withdrew to a lonesome and
unfrequented spot, seating myself,
leaning my face in my hands;

Hours sleepless, deep in the night, when I go forth,
speeding swiftly the country roads, or through the city streets,
or pacing miles and miles, stifling plaintive cries;

Hours discouraged, distracted---for the one
I cannot content myself without.

Hours when I am forgotten (O weeks and months are passing,
but I believe I am never to forget!) . . .

---Walt Whitman